To watch the world go by in multi-colored streamers. 
Oh wow
Such a shame that our universe waits for us by our front steps every morning in all its two-dimensional glory dripping in black and white, containing a mass of information about crimes, achievements, policies, politics, scams... By morning its still fresh, but when midday comes, its useless and eventually thrown awat to god knows where. 
But today is different
My dog came between me and the newspaper, tearing the world apart before I could catch a glimpse of it. Great, now I would have to watch the news seeing as its almost noon anyway. 
Thanks Bitch